babybog :')

oh mai god i got my blog back!!!! welcome home baby!!

alright, it just a short reunion with my baby. ignore it.


hi, people. dont know who you are, who is willing to read all of this kind of stupid thing. maybe i shouldnt said my baby is such a stupid thing. sorry babybog (i found it just a new name for my blog heeeee)

it kinda a very long time i didnt write anything on this, it just because i ve lived in my new life here, sarawak. about a years ago, i came and studied here in diploma of engineering of agriculture. still got 2 sem to be settled down so yah quite terrible because im in a mess of life you know like nyawa di hujung tanduk because im out of my expectation to get a much higherrrrrr pointer but i dont get it. that is so sad. you guys might not feel me. im sure.

in my past, when i was in sem 2, i had the most tragedic series in my life. A closed fracture on my right hand. the doc said it is not just two part which is broken, but actually its more to, hancur :) tulang hancur you know. i had kept this secret from much people, because i dont want them to know YANG AKU SEBENARNYA ADA TULANG CACAT. thats why dah lama dah operation aku settle but im still cant be able to do the normal stuff easily. its because, tulang aku still tak elok. eventhough i can ride a motocycle but still kalau tersalah cara it could be worst than ever. it look simple, but deeper i swear.

kau bayangkan eh, alamak sori terkasar lak ayat sori :( i just want to make you guys really get into my situation. ok sambung, kau bayangkan eh, rakan seperjuangan kau tengah bertarung nak ambil test, pung pang pung baca notes do a revision at library, while me, has to make decision whether to do the operation or not. its operation ok bukan benda kecil. dengan takda family nya sini. you have to do all the thing by your self. masa tu aku memang blank habis. berjalan lemah longlai ke dobby hospital, terduduk kat kerusi, and then... burst.. into the tears :') there is nothing else i can do. kau tak operate, kau takleh nak teruskan ambil exam. nak2 pulak masa sem 2 tu aku ambil LK(lukisan kejuruteraan) ohh more worse. lecturer pulak doesnt want to give me chance or even to consider.

so what happen? i took the decision to have an operation. 2 kali operate, first masuk besi second buang balik besi. i dont want to remember how that jarum bius tu tembus tulang belulang aku. sumpah sakit. i swear never want to feel it anymore. NEVER. AND. EVER.

masa sem 1, my pointer was really good. absolutely i can continue to get more higher than that. tapi, apakan daya. allah maha mengatur segala. sem 2 aku jatuh merudum. bukan setakat jatuh. tapi terjunam. aku tak salahkan takdir, ada benda yang maybe aku buat dosa dengan tangan aku ni. sampai allah hadirkan kifarah. aku redha.

started from that, aku dah semakin susah nak kejar balik pointer. jumlah credit makin banyak. so yaaa... uhmm its ok. still struggle by my own, on my table in my room at hostel. alone. how's know, little effort could bring a huge impact ;)


see you again people! in my upcoming next post. love ya




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